Everyone is affected by trauma
Happened to you
Or those who loved you
Or those who cared for you
You carry trauma from any situation
that overwhelmed your capacity
to protect
feel
connect
relate
regulate
release
You act from instincts formed by nature and nurture
Some stories you’ll never know
Each experience unique
Shaped by history
individual and collective
When the perception of danger
bumps you up into hyper arousal
down into hypo arousal
off to never never land
or nothingness
Parts of you still want to fight
freeze
flee
collapse
disappear
Of course
Your defenses are amazing
Helped you survive each agony
Reacting the best way they know how
to protect you
to keep you alive
from the danger you faced
or feels so familiar it’s happening again
Maybe the signs of trauma are
simmering
interfering
overcoming
Maybe they’ve already pulled the plug
to disconnect you from anything, everything
easier not to care or feel or know
But now there’s emptiness
You’re not alone
There is hope
Therapy doesn’t have to be about telling your story again
or knowing why
or knowing what
or forgiving
or forgetting
You can create a relationship
with safety, trust, and acceptance
Build capacity for sensing
the pain you received
by experience or inheritance
Stay in the moment
Tolerate the once overwhelming feelings
Reprocess the trauma
Activate the buried instincts for hope
trust
purpose
action
identity
love
care
belonging
connection
Meet your unmet needs in a healthier way
And release the responsibility
of the parts protecting you from trauma
Be free to say yes
No
Stop
I’m okay
I survived
I did the best I could
It’s not happening right now
I can relearn
I can change
I have support
I am loved
I can love
I am love
I can break the bondage
of intergenerational trauma
I can end the cycle of shame
blame
neglect
abuse
Stop passing on the trauma
to those I love
those I know
those I impact by word and action
I can be healing
I can be fulfilled
I have power
I can be safe
I can engage in healthy relationships
patterns
thoughts
beliefs
boundaries
presence
I can protect myself
I can feel
I can connect
I can relate
I can regulate
I can release trauma
I can be free
Carol is a psychologist and the founder of Therapy Alberta, a private group practice with local psychologists, social workers, and counsellors offering individual, couples, and family counselling and therapy in Calgary and across Alberta.